Ten steps to a happier life

concept · updated

Ten practical shifts from Pieter Hintjens — founder of the ZeroMQ project — for becoming happier and making the people around you happier too. No money or magic required, just a change in how you see the world, yourself, and others: “Happiness… comes from your own actions” (the 14th Dalai Lama).

1. Invest in your senses

Feed body and mind well — cook your own food and make it taste good. Notice beauty on purpose: photograph what strikes you, play music that moves you, wear clothes that feel good, walk the city at night in the rain. Texture, not just achievement, is part of a good life.

2. Do things you’re bad at

Learning is what makes us feel alive — juggling, holding your breath longer, a Rubik’s cube, an instrument played only for yourself, painting. The point isn’t mastery; it’s repeatedly proving to yourself that you can still learn.

3. Enjoy other people

Little makes us happier than other people. Talk to whoever you cross paths with; be nice, chat, smile. If you’re far from people, move closer; if you drive everywhere, restructure your life around walking and cycling instead. Same finding as what makes us happy: relationships are the strongest predictor of happiness.

4. Be part of bigger things

Belonging to communities and projects — online or real-world, founded or joined — makes us feel valued. Even small contributions matter to someone; being precious to strangers is its own reward.

5. Finish your projects

A sense of achievement gives hope and confidence. Keep a running list of your accomplishments, however small, and revisit it yearly. Finish what you start, then move to the next thing.

6. Get rid of bad actors

Nothing makes us more miserable than other people, either. Learn to recognize bad actors — Hintjens wrote a full book on this, The Psychopath Code — and when someone is a chronic source of misery, remove them from your life, whether that takes a day or a year.

7. Ground your emotions

Happiness requires dealing with negative emotion, not suppressing it: notice anger, self-pity, jealousy, fear, hate, loneliness, and set them aside on purpose so happiness has room to take their place. If you drink to relax, cut it out.

8. Revalue your time

Stop spending your time on commuting, boring jobs, meetings, TV — do only what feels worthwhile, with people you like, even if it costs income. Overlaps directly with time-blocking & focus and the “play the game now” rule in win the life game.

9. Travel light

Possessions are more often a burden than a pleasure. Give away or sell what you own that doesn’t make you happy, and don’t let belongings define you — we live in a world of plenty, so you can own less rather than more. A material-world cousin of how much is enough.

10. Want nothing, accept everything

Explore the world without demand and be tolerant of what happens — most people are nice, and even the ones who aren’t teach you something. Wanting nothing means you can’t be disappointed; accepting everything means you see beauty in every moment.

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tags: happiness principles relationships life